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COMPOSE

"Everyone has their own dirty little secrets and I am keeping one now.I don't feel bad for it nor do I feel proud of it.At some point, I wonder why I let it happened and on the other I feel like there's nothing wrong with it.Truth is, this secret is indeed horrible.I could have avoided it in some ways but I did not.

The thing is,I had a choice but I chose negative.Is it a mistake? I don't know.It seems like it's a mistake now but it could turned out to be a good thing,at least for myself.The worst thing about this is that it involves other people.The outcome for this will never be a win for every one involved.Swear,never.In fact,if everyone loses,I am the one who will be losing big time.That's how dirty it is.

I always tell myself to think positive,but there is nothing positive in this.Believe me I have tried my hardest to find and think positive about it.The fact is, even if it is positive,it is still bad.Okay maybe,it's not the thing that is bad.Maybe it's me.No,IT IS ME.hmm

Nobody really knows what I am talking about here.Or do you? Anyway I am not being emotional,I don't feel so.I just feel that what I am doing right now doesn't seem like me.or at least it doesn't seem like what I would do.But it happens and what happens next is for me to bear.

Come to think of it,I have always had this time in my life.I had it before somewhere last year and it's happening again.The difference is,I feel worse than before.Right this moment,I don't have my halo shining above my head and a pair of white wings on my back.

If last year I had grown two horns and a tail,this time I had grown two sharper horns a longer pointed tail.How bad could I be? You don't wanna know.

I have never been good since I left you.Never once in 8 months I did not feel guilty for what I have done to you.I am truly sorry.How I wish I could bend the time

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WAH..Anugerah Skrin 2009..

wah da lme btol x tlis blog..
da lme btol x berdialog ngan kwn2..
hmm..mungkin dsbabkan kesibukan yg cam hanj..
terpaksa melupakn skjp berBLOGGING in..
well..ni just nk upload skit pic2 yg..
tergendalan..n beberapa caption utk..
setiap pic..hehe..enjoy..
ni pic sewaktu aku kne cover ASK09 (anugerah skrin 09)
bertempat di dewan PWTC..bertemakan ala2 arab..
Hikayat 1001 Malam..then aku pkai bju tido la..hehe..

ni pic sewaktu aku mintak WAN SHARMILA.. wish utk 4oth URTV..yg tengah tu unknown..

ni EIRMA TV3..thx to EIRMA..
yg pnting 1st time tgk EIRMA Egyptian..
haha..sgt2 cool2..
ni pic antara wartawan2 yg BEST..
bergambar bersama artis2..

APA YANG SAYA AMALKAN?

sebelum mencuci muka..
mahu ramai terpikat dengan kita?
dan sayang akan kita..
even clash pun masih lagi ada
yang nak kita balik..
amalkan..
bacaan 2 kalimah syahadah,
selawat 3 kali,
al-fatihah sekali,
ayat 3 kul sekali..
sebut nama panjang kita
berserta BIN atau BINTI..
dan sebutlah..
"ya allah ya tuhanku, ampunkan segala dosa ku,
dosa kedua ibu-bapaku,
serta muslimin muslimat mu yang lain,
samada yang masih hidup atau sudah meninggal dunia,

"ya allah berilah aku kesihatan yang baik,
naikkanlah segala cahaya seri seluruh tubuhku
yang engkau cipta dengan sempurna,
seseungguhnya aku mahu segala
cahaya seri tubuh badan dan wajahku
menyejukkan setiap mata yang memandang,
amin.."



then cuci muka dengan
barangan MUSTIKA RATU
makan jamu untuk bersih darah
dan segala toksin dalam badan :)
huhu.. then kalau boleh..
mandi guna shower..
mata kena buka..
baru bersinar then xyah pakai lens da..
poyo je pakai lens haha.. :P